Metroblog

A one-time school project gone terribly, terribly wrong.

31 October 2008

This Is What Nearly Got My Ass Fired Today

Uncontrollable laughter attracts the attention of bosses who may then become inquisitive. Slow computer chose that moment to freeze up. I remained calm, cut her off at the pass by killing my monitor, rising, collecting my coffee cup, and heading for the machine. Later, I claimed it was a private e-mail message and sent her something that I've had on tap awhile. So, no worries. But a quiet reminder that work doesn't approve of personal surfing (though we all bloody well do it, including the various chairma).

But here, in all its glory, it is:
Baby Bird - w4m

I'm fed up with watersports and feel Constrained by traditional dominant- submissive roles? I want to try a more nurturing role: feed me like a baby pelican! Both sexes welcome, males preferred. I will supply the raw herring and you bring the big strap-on beak.

No weirdos.

Location: Your House
This was originally posted to craiglist chicago.

Found it through some blog or other, and I wish I could recall which ... If it was you, let me know and I'll add a link and give you the hat tip.

And yes, I'd have answered. But I think I might be too much of a weirdo for her.

Perhaps this is a job for Raymond Luxury-Yacht (pronounced: "Throatwobbler-Mangrove)?



Oh go on, watch it--it's only a wafer-thin forty-two seconds.

Another craiglist post I spotted was the one entitled "bag of butt plugs and/or mannequins parts". But I noticed that the poster had announced that "Mannequins have been picked up all we have now is the bag of butt plugs," and all I was really interested in was the mannequin parts. I was going to send them to thirtysomething as a gift. But the butt plugs would convey the wrong message entirely.

3 Comments:

At 4:04 PM, Blogger Wandering Coyote said...

Oh, you cannot beat Monty Python...

 
At 4:17 PM, Blogger Metro said...

Not even by asking someone to tie you down and stuff you full of raw herring?

Life's rich pageant was clearly meant to be shown on the comedy network.

 
At 4:19 PM, Blogger Wandering Coyote said...

Well...I guess...But that's just plain weird. A guy with a fake nose trying to get onto TV is funny!

 

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