Okay, Maybe I Do Have a Little Something
So my co-worker George and I were discussing the upcoming election.
"I'd vote for the Greens," quoth he, "But I can't stand the Liberals."
"Because I don't want to pay more taxes."
"So vote Liberal," I advised, "They're planning to give back 10% of your income taxes."
"Oh, but it'd be too easy for Dion to say something like 'With the economy like it is, we can't hand you back your money, so sorry!'"
He's also concerned that "the Green Shaft will make companies pass the tax on to us."
"So you'd rather take your chances with the Tories?"
I explain to him that Harper's "wait-fifty-years-and-see" program is no earthly good. I point out that even if the Conservatives' cap-and-trade system and "intensity targets" (which mean you can actually increase your pollution output so long as you reduce your pollution per unit) had a chance of working, it would still cost companies money, and under his fear-driven scenario, the companies would still pass those costs on to the consumer. But the difference is that the Liberals are offering Canadians cash the-hell back. Which is more than the Conservatives are.
"Look," says I "Go to www.thegreenshift.ca and plug your numbers into the calculator.I bet you'll save money. Mme and I would save $700+ per year."
"Yeah, but that'd get eaten up in energy costs, and more, when gas goes to $2.50 a litre."
"So you figure if the Tories get a majority they'll magically dial it down to a buck a litre? Look--my energy costs (scribbling on back of envelope) work out to about $1200 annually for gas, $600 for heating fuel, $500 for electricity. That's $2300. If it all jumps ten percent I lose $230. From $700, Mme and I are making $470! And with two kids under 18 you'll do even better than we do!"
"Mmmmm ... No," he says distractedly, "I'm not gonna do that. I'd never vote for them anyway."
I guessed at his family income, a combined total of 56,000. According to the calculator he'd save $1200 minus his energy costs. Now he runs two cars, both older, kinda guzzler-y, he heats a home that's bigger than mine, and I assume to 75 or something. So let's assume his energy costs are twice mine: $4,600. Price increases on energy drive his costs up $$460. He gets $1200 back off his taxes, making $800.
With the Conservatives in charge he gets squat.
Teh stupid it is hurting me.
Meanwhile, our fearless K'nigit of the Order of the Blue Sweater (which he wears to prove he's not, in fact, a robot) is busy saying "the economy's fine ... *click*... the economy's fine ... click ....the economy is fine..."
Oh, and after a month of "campaigning" by simply calling his opponents poo-poo heads while failing to appear at a single publicly-accessible event, he's finally going to reveal his platform today.
I hope it has a trapdoor.