Metroblog

A one-time school project gone terribly, terribly wrong.

10 August 2007

Paging Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor

From the hyeeeeeeeeesh! column.

A man in England was so frustrated at having to wait for sex-change surgery that he took matters into his own hands. To make a long story short ... er ... well, he chopped off his genitalia.

As the article points out, Holli, formerly Howard, is a builder and apparent DIY enthusiast.

Through the invaluable assistance of the internet, he found a page somewhere detailing how to carve your meat-and-two-veg at home. Imagine that ... Step One: Lots of towels, check ... Step two: Big sharp knife, check ... Now for Step Three ...

What term does one enter into a search engine to get "How to remove your genitals (male) with a carving knife in the comfort of your own home?" A casual search for "remove your own gentials" undertaken, need I explain, purely in the spirit of scientific inquiry, returned a page on the care and feeding of Pit Bulls, which seems like a rather drastic measure when carving knives are so cheap.

Personally I applaud his initiative. So much money could be saved if all those damn whiners did their own appendectomies, for example. Maybe we could start an incentive program, wherin the government would pay you part of the cost of the surgery you saved the health system from having to perform?

2 Comments:

At 10:07 p.m., Anonymous PJ said...

Isn't that procedure called a "lopitoffamee"?

 
At 5:11 a.m., Blogger Metro said...

As opposed to the F-t-M operation called the strapadicktome?

 

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