A one-time school project gone terribly, terribly wrong.

08 May 2007

Finally a Portrait

Of the elusive Raincoaster, possibly?

I don't know who the woman is ...

Totally ripped off of Octopia, whence I found it grace of PZ Meyers.


At 8:02 p.m., Anonymous archie said...

Brilliant, wonderful and oh so sexy.

Now if we can just get rid of that unnecessary human

At 12:43 a.m., Anonymous G Eagle Esq said...

Bonjour M Metro

I'm struggling to read your Post - I have reached an age where I sometimes forget where I put my Politeness or my Glasses, but I rely on the gentle tolerance of you young people (he snarled enviouly)

... but seriously - which one is die RegenCoaster ????

I salute your Courage in risking a Pictorial Representation of la elusive Squid Championette

One is nervous about commenting at the risk of being reported to her Mesonychoteuthis Hamiltoni friends - they are vastly-able to make their disPleasure felt if one is ever tentacled on the High Seas

However, your images do not seem to accord with the image of a lady, who careereth at significant speed around the Avenues of a small Pacific Coastal Town just north of Seattle on a high-powered tricycle, in pursuit of swiftly retreating herds of Tree Oktopodia, her red hair concealed mysteriously in a Safety Helmet supported by a flock of LongHorses & DisCriminating Readers

Alles Gute

G Eagle

At 10:45 a.m., Blogger Metro said...

When it comes to unnecessary humans, to quote Ko-Ko:
"I've got a little list, I've got a little list ..."

Is this request the embodiment of the well-known Antipodean motto: Nulli sheila sanguine?

But I feel she adds balance to the picture; and wherever Raincoaster is, surely, some balance is necessary and beneficial?

@M. EagLe

Forget the Post, read the Globe and Mail, where journalism very often still reigns. But find your glasses first. I am alarmed at how quickly I have come to depend on mine. I am in fact thinking of having them tinted rose.

As for the M. Hamiltonii, well, there's a reason I live in the high desert. Here in my stony stronghold I am immune from the tentacles of vengeance until or unless the Moist Monstrosity herself doth come against me.

In which case, I have a supply of my secret Juniper-based weapon which shall render her quite, quite, helpless, as on several prior occasions, much to the amusement of YouTube viewers (think Hasselhoff in a bra, or rather don't).

Besides, I also live conveniently close to the mighty Ogopogo, and no mere cephalopod can compete with a cryptoid.

To add to my security, Raincoaster cannot get here because she in fact has no tricycle. In her neighbourhood there is a pawnshop famous for its unintentionally accurate marquee sign reading "Spring is here, and we have your bike!"

The Wet One travels on a pad of slime, supported by banana (sp?) slugs and a squad of enormous hairy beavers.

That's not a helmet, either. It is known as the mantle. You may be able to spot Raincoaster's syphon poking out from below it.

And I believe that's my stop ...

At 11:16 a.m., Anonymous G Eagle Esq said...

Ah, but, Monsieur Metro

Beware the Ides of May

Some time ago, her Friend Philipa's Blog featured a Magic Flying Carpet

I was going to borrow it to drop flour bombs from 15,000 square feet above contradiction (isn't that the height favoured by the USAAF for missions over Afghanistan) onto your most sensible Posts (ie the ones I disagree with)

but I had to abort the Mission ...

something to do with inadequate eye-sight & dyslexic spelling, even with Glasses

.... but what happens if the generous-hearted ApilihP (la Gourmet-Predateuse & terror of anxious batter-fearing Tree OktoPodia) were to lend her Flying Carpet to her Grace the Marchioness for a wee flight with her Tentacled Freonds

Then how secure would your Stoned Mountain Fortress be

Yr ob servt


At 1:36 p.m., Anonymous raincoaster said...

No guano. I just asked his wife for a job. If he doesn't keep her happy, she just might give me one. And THEN where would he be, besides cowering in the corner?

Ogopogo and I go way back. Like, to the Cretaceous period.

At 3:23 p.m., Blogger Metro said...

@g eagle:

Hmmm. It makes one one-der, it doeth. Whence could I provide melself some Air SupPorT?

Or do I meAn AIr SupPlY?

No, no ... Air SupPorT is good.

Saaaaay... Eagle, Ol' Buddy, ol' pallll. What are you up to this summer? I'll set you up with some decent beer and a crate of the local plonk.

Actually, I have disabled the Raincoaster Air Arm by sending it out to be cleaned by these guys, and they'll be bankrupt ere it can be returned. Or at least busy in litigation (Evil snicker).


Cowering in the corner? I suppose I would be a little intimidated if you actually, like, got a job.

Fortunately (and I say this affectionately) history persuades me that there's precious little danger of that happening.

As for your history with Ogopogo, well, I've tried to be polite about your age. And as for your involvement with serpents, I wouldn't care to speculate. Not when the DVD is apparently making the rounds already.

At 6:38 a.m., Anonymous raincoaster said...

Exactly. So be nice to me: there's a lot of money in tentacle porn!

At 8:22 a.m., Anonymous G Eagle Esq said...

Bonjour M Metro

Interesting that you should ask

- Mrs Eagle's great grandfather left Pontefract, Yorkshire in [?] 1837 to settle via New York State in British Columbia, so it's part of the Long Term plan to visit B.C

- but I have been rather hoping that you and Mdm Metro would favour us with a visit to Inglaterra well before them - I can recommend the Cooking and we have lots of room for you to use as a base, now that the Junior Eagles have abandoned their distraught parents for the wider world

Kind regards


At 8:40 a.m., Blogger Metro said...

Well should you make it to our desert shores, M. Eagle, Mme and I would be happy to introduce you to the plonk of the area, on the assumption that you do not swill, quaff and guzzle like (Redacted as insensitive, not collegial, over-assertive, silly, terribly enervating & rude).

Speaking of which, if you accept any Raincoastrian invitations, be sure your anti-fungal meds are up-to-date, carry only the bare minimum of cash, and get a rabies shot.

Mme and I are unlikely to visit Albion's Isle for at least a year. But I have relatives in Lancashire I should visit, and one or two not far from London.

Despite the vile slanders perpetuated in North America against British cooking, I've usually found it tasty and sensible, if a bit too fond of mushrooms.

When we are able to make the trip, we will surely think of you. Thanks. But although we are short of Jr. Metros around here, my experience suggests that painting the bedrooms may be a little premature (even if they're thirty-five).

At 1:28 p.m., Anonymous G Eagle Esq said...

Bonjour mes chers M et Mme Metro

If the BC descendants of Mrs Eagle's ancestor have another Family reunion, my Lady will want us to come over to BC

I wonder

- perhaps you et Mme Metro have driven along the Highway in BC named after Mrs Lovely-Eagle's ancestor - possibly on a mission pur provider le Dentist avec les means pur payer pur son vacance prochaine

Now that I am a semi=naval official, I can write that YOU ARE REQUESTED AND REQUIRED TO PROCEED WITH UTMOST DESPATCH to Ingleterra

We would not want M Metro to come without Mme Metro, who must be as saintly as Mrs Eagle to (expressions censored as pejorative to M Metro et justifiably so to Herr Eagle) .... there is even room for Mlle La RegenCoaster, as well !!!

It is a Truth universally acknowledged that Derbyshire is the best of Countries, mid-way & 2/+ hours away from Lancashire & Londinium

- ideally placed as a base to go all over Middle-Inglaterra with a Hired Chariot

- to see the glories of Chatsworth

.... and of the firepit in le nostre jardin, inspired by our American ex-neighbours who (to our sorrow) now live in Ohio with their magical young boys who used to walk through our Hedge with their Butterfly nets, but they must be now grown into Tall Young Men

Alles Gute


At 8:21 p.m., Anonymous Stiletto said...

Darn! I was just going to ask, Does our beloved Raincoaster know about this one?

At 3:18 p.m., Anonymous Stiletto said...


Am I daft or what? (Please don't answer).

I just read the caption. That is HARSH.

And here I was thinking it was a lovely homage to our lovely Raincoaster.


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